Tiring Hiring

It's that time again (well, okay, fine, it's about three months PAST that time, but I was slow this year) -- the time for the annual (or sometimes semi-annual) hiring of the law clerks -- the time most likely to drive me to drink. Honestly, it's about my least favorite thing to do -- it not only requires that I talk for, like, twenty minutes straight, but also that I find things to talk about while not accidentally biting my tongue, stuttering, saying anything inappropriate,and otherwise maintaining a professional appearance - plus, there are all those writing samples to read, transcripts to review, resumes to frantically scan two seconds before the interview so I have something to ask them about - EXHAUSTING.

But worst of all is the hiring decisions themselves. I mean, yes, sitting there with yet another over-eager law student with the fresh-out-of-the-box-with-the-pins-still-in button-down shirt and his dad's blazer (not that I"m knocking that, since I wore my mom's skirt suit from about 1987 to my first interview!) is not my favorite way to spent a perfectly good morning. But trying to figure out the right combination of physical presence, verbal ability, writing ability and law school bona fides is practically impossible. And that's where I'm stuck right now. I've gone through about fifty applications, and of those, interviewed the top fifteen. Of those, I kept the five that were standouts (which did not include the one poor kid who could not for the life of him recall the name of one single class he was taking this semester. Not a good sign, really.)

Unfortunately, I can only hire three. Two of the candidates were perfect - good grades, fantastic writing samples and good personalities - so they're already in. But I still have three people for the last spot, so two have to go, and I cannot for the life of me decide who. It's impossible. On the one hand, we have the kid with an excellent writing sample of exactly the length we requested but who, in person, didn't have the greatest people skills, was sort of repellent in appearance and appeared a little shifty-eyed - he seemed more likely to sell you a used car with a rolled-back odometer than to safeguard your interests. On the other hand, we have the very tall, very attractive guy who was sort of verbally awkward and robotic in that way that just-out-of-the-gawky-stage high school boys are before they figure out that they're actually cute and girls are interested in them (and become cocky asses, generally) - his writing sample was good, but shorter than we wanted, his grades are good but the awkward thing is likely to drive people up the wall -- he kept sort of just looking at me for awhile when I asked him a question, and then gave short, monosyllabic answers -- except when I asked about his outside interests and then he got all chatty. Finally, there was the guy with a very professional appearance, fabulous people skills, clearly likely to make everyone love him - but whose writing sample was just adequate, although his grades were excellent. The job is mostly writing, obviously, but with quite a bit of partner-contact and some client contact, so both the people skills and the writing skills count. HOW TO DECIDE? Do you go so-so on both counts, or fantastic on one and hope they learn the other? If the latter, which one is someone most likely to learn? gaaaaaaahhhh......

Comments

[Thinking Fool]

People are not going to learn to be good writers AFTER law school. If you don't have those skills by then, you might improve, but you're not going to become GREAT. On the other hand, the people person could probably bring in lots of clients. AND, law school exams are all writing, so maybe he just chose a bad writing sample and isn't as bad as you think. Plus, he'll probably fuck more summer associates and that's always good for your firm's reputation. I'm not exactly sure how, but I'm certain it is.

[Baby Lawyer]

Huh. So, like, next year's recruiting slogan could be "You'll really enjoying *coming* to work here"? (Are really bad sex puns less awful than regular puns? nope, didn't think so.)

[Thinking Fool]

Or maybe even "You'll really enjoy *coming* here." :-) Ha. I think it's brilliant. ;-)

[writing up dissertation]

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