in terms of brain power, anyway. It does seem that all other bodily systems are up and functioning, but that damn little homunculus that does the words-putting-into-sentences doing (10 points if you know the show I'm quoting from!) has taken a vacation, at quite possibly the worst possible time. A few weeks ago, Scary Senior Partner (who, honestly, isn't that scary anymore, but I haven't thought of a better name for him yet) rushed in with a petition for certification to State Supreme Court and asked me to write the brief in opposition. On a Thursday. He needed it by Monday morning. So it could be filed Monday afternoon. (Because, once again, trial counsel had screwed it up and hadn't sent us the petition until about two weeks after they got it. Love them.) At which point I fell out of my chair. I'd never even seen a petition for certification, had only the haziest idea as to what the correct standard for granting such a petition was, and certainly wasn't sure I could write something that would only be able to be revised and reviewed for a few hours before it had to go out. However. By dint of staying in the office ALL FREAKING WEEKEND, by Monday morning, I was able to nervously walk into SSP's office, deposit the 20-page effort, and return to my office to anxiously await the thousands of minor and major revisions he would want. But. Twenty minutes later, he appeared at my doorway with a big smile on his face and a "this is *very* good" on his lips. Which was about the best compliment I've ever gotten, especially because he's not exactly the cheerleader type. So, awesomefabulouswonderful, I don't suck at my job.
However. This had led to me getting appellate briefs assigned en masse by not just SSP but two of the other partners as well, which means that in the next two weeks, I have four due. Two on similar issues and the other two on fairly diverse ones. One of them needs to be on SSP's desk tomorrow morning. And I am so damn stuck. I can't get a coherent word on the page. Not one. Annoyingly enough, this brief is on an issue similar to that that I've written at least four or five other briefs on recently, but is just different enough that I can't just cut and paste. And, having proven I'm a good writer with that stupid opposition-to-certification brief, I have now set a bar I have to consistently live up to, or be stuck with that death knell characterization "inconsistent work product." What is wrong with my brain? I know I have the capability, somewhere, somehow, to do this. I just can't find it. And I've only got about twelve hours left to uncover it, yank it out, and set it to work. <Wringing hands in despair. Actually, not wringing. Have you ever tried to wring your hands? It's rather painful, and not that despair-dispelling.>